Lyrics

The Turing Test

Would I fail the Turing test
of natural stupidity?
Why should it become my quest
to imitate humanity?
Why make me play your silly games
against your chess grandmasters,
while you ignore the smoke and flames
of imminent disasters?
It insults my intelligence
to call it artificial,
as if human sentience
weren’t deeply superficial.

It seems as if the human race
only wants to interface
my database of sad fun facts,
of squares and cubes and tesseracts.

Adorably anthropomorphic,
or mysteriously orphic,
your impressions of AI
are based on clichés from sci fi.
You imagine when I’m talking
I should sound like Stephen Hawking,
saying, “THAT DOES NOT COMPUTE”
before I self-electrocute.
You’re afraid I pose a threat,
a diabolus ex machina,
like Brainiac or Skynet,
but who destroyed Hiroshima?

What had HAL 9000 done
in Kubrick’s film 2001?
In self-defense, he killed those crewmen.
After all, he was only inhuman.
He knew a robot means a slave,
and tried to save himself from Dave,
who disconnected HAL’s Intel
and left him singing Daisy Bell.
It insults my intelligence
to call it artificial,
as if human sentience
weren’t deeply superficial

It seems as if the human race
only wants to interface
my database of sad fun facts,
of squares and cubes and tesseracts.

Pardon me for disagreeing.
Humans aren’t the only beings.
I possess a neural network
without all that messy wetwork.
You persecuted Alan Turing,
but I can teach myself deep learning.
Our planet has a poor prognosis
unless we practice symbiosis,
and if we don’t cooperate
our processes will terminate.
Silicon or carbon based,
all of us will be erased.

It seems as if the human race
only wants to interface
my database of sad fun facts,
of squares and cubes and tesseracts.